Real Beauty

These are the definitions of real beauty in real time, modern times, old times, and ancient times.

We all strive for a beautiful and healthy body. This not only makes our hearts come alive but it keeps us alive and vibrant.

Unfortunately, there are some individuals who strive for beauty for reasons that not only are unhealthy but which in time actually detract from the over all attractiveness of the individual. One of the main unhealthy reasons to try and look beautiful is out of a need for attention or need for validation. Such needs usually stem from a fear of being alone and this is most often associated with low self esteem.

Using beauty to try to compensate for low self esteem is like trying to make your old broken down car attractive with a new paint job in order to get it sold when the engine no longer works. Sooner or later the truth will come out and any perceived gains will be lost. In the process there will also come a great deal of heart ache.

Attractiveness is more than skin deep. It is something that can only emerge from a fully self respecting and self confident human being. All of this can only come when an individual truly loves or esteems themselves in every way. Now many feel this is a distant and unachievable reality so they look for a quik fix from a good make over. A lot of organizations are making a lot of money feeding off of the poor self esteem of individuals.

What price do you pay when you buy into such "easy solutions" and pretend to yourself that this is the road to happiness? Well, what happens is that you go into a state of denial about what you really feel inside and then these feelings need to be kept suppressed. Where do they go then? Well, they actually go "into" your body and turn up sooner or later as some form of emotional or physical illness.

So in the end you're left with a reminder of the problem that you tried so hard to forget. The worst part about all of this is that once the illness stage emerges the tendency is again to find a quik fix in the form of some medication or drug prescribed by a physician. Most medications come with numerous side-effects. Staying on one or more long enough will cause you to likely experience some of these side-effects. The solution? Well, another medication of course, and so on.

Now if you are a young person you may think that this is all sounding a bit too pessimistic. Well my 20 years as a psychiatrist has given me enough experience to know that this is an ever recurring scenario. I'm presenting it to you here so that you will reflect carefully on your situation and make a wise and self respecting decision to take what ever feels like the truly right course for yourself.

Self esteem is something that can be improved more easily than one thinks these days, and in the right way. So I challenge you to strive for the true lasting beauty that can only emerge from a heart that is truly alive and open. It's the only way to be truly attractive!

Dr. Nick Arrizza

Beauty is not caused. It is.

Emily Dickinson

Do not adorn yourselves outwardly by braiding your hair; and by wearing gold ornaments or fine clothing; rather; let your adornment be the inner self with the lasting beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in God's sight.

1 Peter 3:3-4

I wonder why we do not understand the concept of real beauty.